Running Away

Here I lie in my bed
Waiting for the days I dread
Seeking answers with my head
To console my heart of lead.

Putting up a modest fight—because
“Two wrongs don’t make a right.”
Yellow “Cautions,” all I see
Before the madman driving me.

He runs the lights with reckless glee
Escaping imagined emergencies.
Real-life heart-aches, I agree
Could catch us, if we don’t flee.

But left also, are patient friends
Who will forgive and make amends
Who challenge, love, even defend…
We would be helped, in the end.

Different heartaches, some more dire,
Lie up the road, like a flash fire
Denied by promises from a Liar
Who laughs when faith is retired. ¹

Take courage child. You can’t outrun
The love and care of God’s own Son.
So, when that fire is all done,
“Beauty from ashes,” has begun. ²

1. John 8:44c, 2 Cor. 5:7

2.  Isaiah 61:3

© 2015 gratefulsue

back to Authenticity and Empathy

February 17, 2022
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In early 2010, my husband had been telling me for about a year that, “The Lord wants us to move” …again. I had been consistently resisting the idea because I loved the people we were working with and the job we had. It was the absolute most fulfilling time of my married life. I had felt like the move to West Virginia, a mere three and a half years prior, and the job we were given, was a true gift from God. Leaving it, my friends, a great church, and uprooting the children again, was not appealing to me in any way. But, here we were, having that same conversation again, just before going to sleep.

As I lay in bed in the dark, I composed most of this poem in my head, then finished it in the morning. It was only 5 verses and a very negative poem—reflecting how angry I felt. I don’t think the Lord is offended by negativity. He already knows and wants our authentic thoughts. Sometimes verbalizing the negativity helps us see that we are not living by faith.

Sometime later, I told my husband I would agree to his desire to move. I could not convince him to be content where we were. We moved about six months later, just in time for the kids to start a new school in the fall. I’m not saying that moving was the right decision, or that I should or should not have given in to my husband’s preferences. But, what I am saying is that God goes with us even if we make wrong choices.

I wrote the 6th and final verse sometime after the move. He makes “beauty from ashes” as we walk in our faith. Sure enough, in retrospect, it turned out that our children made wonderful, healthy friendships in the new state. We had moved closer to family, and most everyone appreciated the warmer winters than what we had in West Virginia. All this made the losses easier.