Photo by Claudia Wolff

Unforgiveness

I keep looking at his sin and thinking,
            “How can I
                        EVER forgive THIS?”

I keep thinking about the audacity,
            with outrage.
                        Betrayal with a kiss. ¹

Lies and more lies. Deep wounds
            inflicted, intentionally.
                        Multiple injuries—bleeding.

I might have reduced the suffering...
            but, now it’s too late
                        for balm we were needing. 

Sins of selfishness against his peers,
            against his loved ones—
                        who blindly trusted. 

But now, I can see. And now,
            I know. Now,
                        I’m just disgusted. 

Here in my corner of anger and judgment,
            along with sadness,
                        revenge is a treat. 

Gulping unforgiveness quenches
            my thirst for payback, ²
                        and tastes sweet. 

Yet, I know this drink is poison.
            Not life-giving ³
                        (although addicting). 

Somehow, I must heed my Savior’s bidding
            and take the antidote
                        He’s mixing. 

Open up my will, not just my head.
            And learn from Him who saw
                        great wrong and pain. 

He was offended and abused by
            so much more than I—
                        yet, He saw gain... 

By loving the offenders,
            dying for them,
                        (and for me). 

He also loved the victims—
            both captives and captors,
                        whom He came to free. ⁴ 

He is my example. ⁵  How to forgive?
            I must love more—
                        love from my heart. ⁶ 

I can choose today to have mercy ⁷
            toward the offender.
                        And, that’s a good start.

  1. Luke 22:48

  2. Romans 12:19

  3. Ephesians 4: 26, 31

  4. Luke 4:18

  5. Luke 23:34

  6. Mark 12:30-31, 1 Cor. 13:4-7

  7. Matthew 18: 32-33

 

© 2017 gratefulsue

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On first read, you may think that this poem is just wrong. Why should I “love” a person who has robbed, beaten, abused, slandered, cheated or lied to me? Well, I don’t mean an emotional type of love. Nor do I even mean one must talk to or spend time with the person, necessarily. Maybe the poem is just recommending having some empathy for the person who has wounded me. Or, maybe it means I must love Christ more, who loves and forgives all people who trust in Him. Maybe both.

What do I mean by, “I can choose today to have mercy toward the offender. And that’s a good start”? It might mean not unleashing all the vile things I would like to say to the person who has wounded me. Or, perhaps it means thinking about the conditions in his or her past which may have contributed to this person’s character deficits, poor choices, sins or crimes.

Having mercy toward others is for my sake, it may be the first step toward being able to forgive the person. In Matthew 6:12-15, Jesus asks us to forgive as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness is not saying that what the offender did is okay. Jesus is just reminding us that our sins nailed him to that cross as much as our adversaries’ sins.

Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean that a debt does not need to be repaid. Nor does it imply that a relationship will not end, or that a person who has broken the law will not have to go to prison. Forgiveness is simply the letting go of a burden, whether a person apologizes and makes restitution or does not, whether the offender goes to prison or does not.