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Have you ever had dreams about a former boyfriend or girlfriend… when you’re married to someone else? I have. I had to have a tough talk with myself and say an earnest prayer to God to get rid of them. Theoretically, “May this life be embraced, adored,” is indeed the right answer. It was the right answer for me for many years after the poem was written in 1996, even though marriage was often hard.

Of course, if there is any kind of abuse involved in your marriage, get out immediately with your children. Your mental, emotional and physical health and safety are the most important priorities. It is not ever “God’s will” for you to stay in a dysfunctional, unhealthy or unsafe marriage union.

If “embracing this life” is not working for one or both of you, and there is not abuse, first seek out counseling. If that doesn’t help, it’s okay, perhaps even wise, to consider separation or divorce, regardless of what your religious tradition recommends. The Bible does not directly address many of the challenges marriages face today such as personality disorders, drug addictions, alcoholism, workaholism, pornography, gambling, illegal activity, etc. We live in a fallen world, where there are no pat answers for every marriage. Rest assured, the health and safety of you and your children is God’s first priority and should also be yours.